A political earthquake

Australian flag pills

Rumours are gaining pace that the Pharmacy Guild of Australia is poised to register itself as a political party to contest next year’s Federal Election.

Given its vast network of pharmacies and pharmacists it will be able to contest every electorate around the country, and win substantial popular support.

“There’s even talk of us becoming the new third force in Australian politics,” said one source.

The now famous Guild petition in 2014 which gained over one million signatures, making it the largest single petition in Australian political history, highlighting the power and reach of the Guild.

AJP contacted NSW Guild president David Heffernan who said that, while he couldn’t confirm or deny the rumours, such a move by the Guild would represent a major shake-up of the federal political landscape.”

“I am not about to endorse the title ‘NSW Premier Heffernan, however, ‘Prime Minister Twomey’ has a nice ring to it,” he said.

While most rumours have, to date, revolved around the new, unnamed, Guild-run party contesting in the lower house, one insider said there is potential for winning a few Senate places nationally.

“We have the ability to field a candidate in every seat of Australia and man every polling station with 5-10 people handing out election material – remember 20% of voters have not made up their mind when they approach the polling booth,” Mr Heffernan said.

“Think of the changes we can make happen to impact the supermarket duopoly and decision such as codeine up-scheduling,” the insider said.

“You must remember, the Guild has been around since 1927, we far outweigh in age and history neophytes such as these, and indeed the Liberal Party itself.” 

AJP contacted the Australian Electoral Commission to see if any paperwork has been lodged with them, but they said a response wouldn’t be forthcoming till after 1 April and the Easter break.

Previous Week in review
Next S8 warning for proprietor, pharmacists

NOTICE: It can sometimes take awhile for comment submissions to go through, please be patient.


  1. pagophilus

    Fancy that – a one-issue party. The guild doesn’t even represent pharmacy (only owners). Why should they be involved in decisions which affect over 20 million people?

    • Willy the chemist

      You must be a black and white, one eyed footie supporter too? lol!

      • pagophilus

        Nope, I detest footy and other waste-of-time activities.

  2. JD

    Nice one Chris!

  3. Bluebottle

    Do you guys at AJP ever have a day off?

  4. Kent Eddings

    Wow pagophilus – so anti guild you completely miss a joke…… 😀

  5. JimT

    April Fools………….or is it ???

  6. chris

    Compared to some of the senators out there I would think some of us would do a fair job. And what was that pay again for a six year term, two hundred grand? Crikes, I used to make that much profit selling panadeine extras but not any more. Might need to suuplement by sitting next to and having a few bottles of shiraz with me old mate derryn hinch !

  7. Big Pharma

    But how would other parties survive without the massive PGA political donations?

    In other news the PGA has decided to remove its proposed HMR moratorium and allow patients access to evidence-based collaborative clinical pharmacist input keeping patients out of hospital and saving the taxpayer millions! APRIL FOOLS!!!!!!

  8. Ok feds up guys-after all it is 1st. Of April!! Lol!!

Leave a reply